Endeth The Dark Knight weekend.
The Dark Knight weekend is officially over.
I have a few stories, but I'm really tired (3 straight 9 AM showings = three straight 6 AM wake ups), so I'm going to leave you with this little gem from this afternoon and a little bit of backstory.
Today was easily the busiest of all three afternoons (nearly every afternoon show, both IMAX and regular, was sold out), so I was put at Guest Services doing a job that I have not trained for and am not qualified to do. What I can do well though, is answer phones. And the phones were ringing constantly.
Me: Muvico Parisian 20, this is Sarika speaking, how may I help you?
Girl: Are you guys playing The Dark Knight?
Me (exasperated): Yes. We are showing The Dark Knight every 40 minutes, IMAX shows are sold out throughout the weekend, but you can currently buy tickets for every other evening show, but they are selling out quickly.
Girl: Is that Batman?
Me: Yes.
Girl: Okay, now is that, like, based on a comic strip or something?
At that point I was unable to find words. That had to be a joke, right? A prank to play on movie theatre employees on the busiest weekend of the year? I'll leave the Space Chimps story for a later time. It just doesn't compare.
Passing judgment.
Today a lady asked me what movie she should watch. Rather than wanting advice, she really just wanted someone to tell her what to do. She then proceeded to talk about her divorce and time off and credit cards. Good God, she liked to talk. I told her that Wall-E was easily the best movie currently on the board, and that it was heartrending and wonderful.
So, she bought a ticket to Wall-E. About an hour later, I see her walk out of the theatre and stop to tell people that she doesn't know, NOT to watch this film.
It occurred to me then that this woman obviously did not have a heart (or emotions, or naturally blond hair) or was just stupid, so it's no real surprise that her husband divorced her.
Wall-E is a great film.
Events of last Friday
Last Friday, I worked during the day, so I didn't get to see my normal mix of sketchy drunk guys and jerkasses, but the idiots were indeed out in full effect!
1. A handicapped guy decided to pick a fight in the bathroom with an undercover cop. First he punched him in the face, and then a full out brawl ensued. The cops were called, incident reports were filled, and people were banned for life, and a black guy with an iPod filled me in with all of the bathroom details.
What did this result in? Tens of people asking for refunds because they felt unsafe in the theatre. Fantastic!
2. Four summer camp groups came in. One of 150 kids. What did this result in? Tens of people asking for refunds because they didn't want to be in a theatre with children. You're seeing Wall-e at 12:30 PM. Get a job, guys! Don't complain about children in a theatre in the middle of summer in the middle of the day!
3. One of the children (who I now regret defending) vomited. Everywhere.
4. An old man asked me to give money to his young female 'companions' while he rushed away for an emergency. I told him that I couldn't do this but he was more than welcome to go back into the theatre and give it to them. Instead, he waited in line to give it to Guest Services. We spent the next hour or so WAITING for these girls (and later interrogating them about the man, so they now probably think that the old man was up to something nefarious) and getting pissed off.
5. I was a greeter for a while. I don't mind being a greeter, but really, it's a job that they could train monkeys to do. Not even chimps, I'm talking capuchins or spider monkeys. A hilarious sidenote is that "capuchins" comes up as "chinstrap" on SpellCheck.
6. I hate Palm Beachers. I was working box for a short while because of an influx of people/people calling in/insanity with the cops and fight and such, and these two small Palm Beach girls (probably around 6 and 8) come in wearing $300 Dior sunglasses and dressed like trophy wives with their nanny. Now, if children want to be treated like adults, I'll treat them like adults. I won't pander to them. So, I didn't. And these little girls made it a point to speak down to me, even more so after I recommended Wall-E to them. Giving them and in-depth description of "Get Smart" and going in to detail about the 1960s television series left them with blank stares on their faces. Score one for me. Then I refused to sell them tickets to The Love Guru, because I don't believe in selling tickets to a 120 minute dick joke to children. Was I on a high horse at that point? Probably. But I don't care, because I hate Palm Beachers and that their children act entitled. Just because your sunglasses are the equivalent to my paycheck, doesn't mean that you can talk down to me.
A very angry copy editor?
This is from the textbook from my Advertising class. The orange highlighting is mine. It's either an angry copy editor or a printer averse to capital letters.
Cute. Is it yours?
European Man: Cute, is it yours?
Me: It's a raccoon!
European Man: It's cute.
Me: It probably has rabies!
European Man: Yeah (he smiles and walks away).
This is my life. Today, the raccoon featured above sidled up to me and I freaked out. It was about a foot and a half away from me before jumping into a garbage can. It wasn 't scared at all. Between freaking out and having people laugh at me (I'm assuming they were, as they weren't helping me!), I managed to take a photo of it. Harold and Kumar flashbacks...
This only happens to me.
